Washington, D.C. (FFF blog) – On the heels of yesterday’s passage of the fair wages bill, the League of American Wives (the LAW) has today announced that they plan a large scale cutback on sexual activities within American marriages. Suzie Chapman, spokeswoman for the LAW claims, “as a result of American men now being forced to receive the same measly earnings that the ladies do, we feel it is important that they have as much energy as possible so that they can do more work. To further those efforts, we are recommending a full-scale reduction on sexual activities for all American wives.” It is thought that in many cases across the country, husbands will notice very little impact from the reductions. In other cases, this announcement could lead to very tough marital choices. John Duncan, of Plano, Texas and a married man of 20 years said, “If Jenny cuts back any further on our activities, I suppose that means I will be forced to choose between Valentine’s Day and our anniversary. That will be an extremely tough choice.” Government officials believe that the cutbacks should have no impact on activities at the White House, noting that any Presidential hanky panky was effectively eliminated with the choice to allow the ‘first mother-in-law’ to maintain residence at the White House.
In a related story, the Female Gold-diggers Union and male software engineers across the country have indicated that the fair wage act will essentially eliminate any desire or ability for members from either of these group to have sex with the opposite gender.
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1 comment:
Indiana Jones... Great write up.
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